Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
