you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
