Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize