He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize