i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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