I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
