I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
