i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
