She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
