I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
