well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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