turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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