Heybabeimwearingurpanties
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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