Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i can't believe i had my finger in that
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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