jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You were trust falling into bushes
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize
