This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
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