Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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