the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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