But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
