Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize