Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
