White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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