when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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