You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
