So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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