so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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