whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
