I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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