Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I'm just crazy horny about you
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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