i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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