in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
