She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
