I can text with my tongue
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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