You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
