I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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