Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
The beer is more important than you right now.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
