I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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