Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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