Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize