hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
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