I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
