you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
