Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
