Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
