I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize