I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
