I wish I only lived at night.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Damn victory sex feels great
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
