doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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