You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
