i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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